Ali Wong’s latest Netflix special, titled Single Lady, which premiered on October 8, intriguingly intertwines her personal life with her comedy. The special encompasses her love story with Bill Hader, following her divorce from Justin Hakuta in 2022 after eight years of marriage. Wong and Hader briefly dated before publicly confirming their relationship in April 2023. The couple has since made appearances at high-profile events like the Golden Globes and Emmys, where Wong received accolades for her role in the Netflix series Beef.
At the beginning of her special, Wong expresses her surprise regarding the intense media interest in her divorce from Hakuta, with whom she shares two children. “I didn’t expect the news of my divorce to be so widespread and public,” she shares. “I felt really embarrassed and ashamed, but I didn’t realize that all these media outlets were like a Bat-Signal, letting potential suitors know I was suddenly available. I’ve never been pursued this much in my life.”
One of those suitors reached out to her after they had crossed paths a couple of times at dinner parties. Once he got her number through a mutual friend, he revealed his feelings. Wong recounts his message: “Hey, Ali. I heard about your divorce today, and I’ve got to say…I’m excited. I’ve had a crush on you forever and told my best friend years ago that you were my dream girl. I want you to be my girlfriend.”
Interestingly, Wong had just joined a dating app the day before. She humorously noted, “I just paid $250. You seem really nice, but I gotta get my money’s worth.”
After their chat, Wong traveled to Europe and was surprised when Hader had flowers sent to her in multiple cities, including London, Amsterdam, Cologne, and Copenhagen. While her female friends found the gesture sweet and were envious, her male friends reacted differently, with one commenting that it sounded “psychopathic.” Wong pointed out a societal trend where any kind gesture from a man is often viewed with suspicion or as a sign of mental instability.
This situation resonates with a past discussion Hader had in the writers’ room for his HBO series Barry. In one instance, Barry’s effort to impress his crush by replacing her broken laptop was interpreted differently by male and female writers. While the men deemed the act romantic, the women found it excessively forward, illustrating a broader conversation about gender perceptions in relationships.
Throughout her journey of singlehood, Wong embarked on various dating experiences, including one with a notable movie director whose identity she refrained from disclosing. Reflecting on her dating life, Wong admitted, “For the longest time, I was so focused on getting dicked down because finding a boyfriend with talent, humor, genuine connection, and someone I would feel proud to introduce to my kids and friends seemed impossible.”